In this episode, my guest is Dr. David Buss, Professor of Psychology at the University of Texas, Austin, and one of the founding members of the field of evolutionary psychology.

Dr. Buss describes his work on how people select mates for short and long-term relationships, the dynamics of human courtship, and mate value assessment — meaning how people measure up as potential partners. We also discuss the causes of infidelity and differences for infidelity in men and women. He explains how people evaluate and try to alter other people’s mate value as a means to secure and even poach mates. We discuss monogamous and non-monogamous relationships in humans. And we discuss what Dr. Buss calls “the dark triad”— features common in stalkers and narcissists that relate to sexual and psychological violence in relationships.

This episode is sure to be of interest to anyone single or in a relationship who seeks to know how people select mates and anyone who is interested in forming and maintaining healthy romantic partnerships.

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Links:
Dr. Buss' New Book "When Men Behave Badly" - https://amzn.to/3FThTsG
Dr. Buss' Website at University of Texas, Austin - https://labs.la.utexas.edu/buss/david-buss/
Dr. Buss' Twitter - https://twitter.com/ProfDavidBuss

Timestamps:
00:00:00 Introducing Dr. David Buss
00:04:10 Sponsors: ROKA, InsideTracker, Headspace
00:08:33 Choosing a Mate
00:13:40 Long Term Mates: Universal Desires
00:18:31 What Women & Men Seek in Long-Term Mates
00:25:10 Age Differences & Mating History
00:32:20 Deception in Courtship
00:37:30 Emotional Stability
00:38:40 Lying About Long-Term Interest
00:41:56 Short-Term Mating Criteria, Sliding Standards & Context Effects
00:46:25 Sexual Infidelity: Variety Seeking & (Un)happiness & Mate Switching
00:54:25 Genetic Cuckolds, How Ovulation Impacts Mate Preference
00:57:00 Long-Term vs. Short-Term Cheating, Concealment
00:59:15 Emotional & Financial Infidelity
01:04:35 Contraception
01:06:22 Status & Mating Success
01:10:10 Jealousy, Mate Value Discrepancies, Vigilance, Violence
01:24:13 Specificity of Intimate Partner Violence
01:25:12 Mate Retention Tactics: Denigration, Guilt, Etc.
01:27:33 Narcissism, Machiavellianism, Psychopathy
01:33:25 Stalking
01:39:15 Influence of Children on Mate Value Assessments
01:43:24 Attachment Styles, Mate Choice & Infidelity
01:46:40 Non-Monogamy, Unconventional Relationships
01:54:00 Mate Value Self Evaluation, Anxiety About the Truth
02:02:12 Self Deception
02:05:35 The Future of Evolutionary Psychology & Neuroscience
02:06:56 Books: When Men Behave Badly; The Evolution of Desire, Textbooks
02:10:42 Concluding Statements, Zero-Cost Support: Subscribe, Sponsors, Patreon, Thorne

Please note that The Huberman Lab Podcast is distinct from Dr. Huberman's teaching and research roles at Stanford University School of Medicine. The information provided in this show is not medical advice, nor should it be taken or applied as a replacement for medical advice. The Huberman Lab Podcast, its employees, guests and affiliates assume no liability for the application of the information discussed.

Title Card Photo Credit: Mike Blabac - https://www.blabacphoto.com
Audio Engineering: Joel Hatstat at High Jump Media