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Life Is Hard: How Philosophy Can Help Us Find Our Way
A NEW YORKER AND THE ECONOMIST BEST BOOK OF 2022" Life Is Hard is a humane consolation for challenging times. Reading it is like speaking with a thoughtful friend who never tells you to cheer up, but, by offering gentle companionship and a change of perspective, makes you feel better anyway" The New York Times Book Review' An eloquent, moving, witty and above all useful demonstration of philosophy's power to help us weather the storms of being human ' Oliver Burkeman, author of FOUR THOUSAND WEEKS______________________________________Pain, Loneliness, Grief, Injustice ... Hope?Life is hard - as the past few years have made painfully clear. From personal trauma to the injustice and absurdity of the world, sometimes simply going on can feel too much.But could there be solace - and even hope - in acknowledging the hardships of the human condition? Might doing so free us from the tyranny of striving for our "best lives" and help us find warmth, humanity, and humour in the lives we actually have? Could it inspire in us the desire for a better world?In this profound and personal book, Kieran Setiya shows how philosophy can help us find our way. He shares his own experience with chronic pain and the consolation that comes from making sense of it. He asks what we can learn from loneliness and loss about the value of human life. And he explores how we can fail with grace, confront injustice, and search for meaning in the face of despair. Drawing on ancient and modern philosophy, as well as fiction, comedy, social science and personal essay, Life is Hard is a book for this moment - a work of solace and compassion. It draws us towards justice, for ourselves and others, by acknowledging what it means to be alive.
234 pages, Hardcover
First published January 1, 2022
494 people are currently reading
5,942 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 238 reviews
December 11, 2022
It was good to read a moral philosophy book that starts with the principle that being happy is not the same as living well. I have read a lot of moral philosophy books, and I find that too many of them overrate happiness and suggest that maximizing happiness should be our goal, that a person's level of happiness should be the measure of a good life. Happiness is great, but there is so much more. Learning, striving, accomplishment, feeling flow and adding to the diversity of my life experiences are all meaningful to me, but are at best indirectly related to happiness. Part of a good life is being good at doing something. Sometimes pursuing those goals can be frustrating, boring, or unsatisfying or can even make me angry, but I wouldn't give up the goals or the experience of pursuing them in exchange for more happiness. And then there is outright unhappiness, which comes from sad and tragic events, disease, failure and other setbacks in pursuing goals or from misbehavior (or perceived misbehavior) of others. Those are things that I'd never wish for, except that life would be incomplete without them. And since we experience the good by feeling its contrast with the bad, we could not appreciate our good times without having bad times for comparison.
Mr. Setiya doesn't discuss the parts of life that are difficult but rewarding or the value of the bad in helping us to appreciate the good. But he makes some other good points, discussing the importance of relationships and our human connections with other people, which are not always easy, but are essential to a full life. He understands that people are more important than abstractions. He also spends a lot of time discussing the importance of being of service to other people. It's not always enjoyable, but it has rewards for the doer and the recipient and for the larger community. There is also an extensive discussion of grief and how to respond to it. I'm generally in agreement with him on this. You shouldn't minimize it, ignore it or cherish it, but you have to accept it and let it run its course.
Somehow I wanted more from this book. Maybe some deeper philosophical analysis. Maybe a book less targeted at a broad audience. Maybe some more surprises in his analysis. I don't know. I may look at some of Mr. Setiya's academic writing since I do believe that he is thinking in the right direction and his writing for a scholarly audience might give me what I felt that I was missing here, though I usually find modern academic writing in philosophy to be needlessly dense and focused on things that I don't care about.
Mr. Setiya doesn't discuss the parts of life that are difficult but rewarding or the value of the bad in helping us to appreciate the good. But he makes some other good points, discussing the importance of relationships and our human connections with other people, which are not always easy, but are essential to a full life. He understands that people are more important than abstractions. He also spends a lot of time discussing the importance of being of service to other people. It's not always enjoyable, but it has rewards for the doer and the recipient and for the larger community. There is also an extensive discussion of grief and how to respond to it. I'm generally in agreement with him on this. You shouldn't minimize it, ignore it or cherish it, but you have to accept it and let it run its course.
Somehow I wanted more from this book. Maybe some deeper philosophical analysis. Maybe a book less targeted at a broad audience. Maybe some more surprises in his analysis. I don't know. I may look at some of Mr. Setiya's academic writing since I do believe that he is thinking in the right direction and his writing for a scholarly audience might give me what I felt that I was missing here, though I usually find modern academic writing in philosophy to be needlessly dense and focused on things that I don't care about.
March 13, 2024
This was a beautifully written book that everyone should have on their shelf. Admittedly, there were no earth shattering revelations or life altering epiphanies, but what it did offer was perspective and insight. Setiya skillfully gives you the information and context you need as he goes so you do not have to have a background in philosophy to understand and enjoy this book. The way he ties it all together is poetry and his humor adds levity to some deceptively deep and heavy topics. This book invites thought, compassion, reflection, and consideration, both for one's own life and the lives of those around us.
November 4, 2022
It always comes down to some form of "just deal w/it".. it seems to me :)
July 9, 2024
"You remind me of someone who is looking through a closed window and cannot explain to himself the strange movements of a passerby. He doesn’t know what storm is raging out there or that this person might only with difficulty be keeping himself on his feet."
~ Ludwig Wittgenstein
I was in the mood to do some reading about mindset, so I bumped this one up in my "to-read" queue. Unfortunately, I did not enjoy the writing here... It started off fairly innocuously, and then turned into an absolute shitshow as the book progressed. More below. This will be a long one, so get comfortable.
The book opens with the quote above.
Author Kieran Setiya is a Professor of Philosophy at the Massachusetts Institute of Technology. He was born in Hull, UK. He is known for his work in ethics, epistemology, and the philosophy of mind.
Kieran Setiya:
The book opens with a decent intro. Unfortunately, this was probably the high water mark of the book. I am admittedly very particular about how engaging I find a book's prose, and this one missed the mark for me here. I was just not a fan of the author's writing style.
I have found that, broadly speaking; books on philosophy break into two disticnt categories. The first is where the author goes off on long-winded esoteric tangents, and manages to effectively lose the forest for the trees. The second is where the author tells the reader an interesting story, and accompanies this story with the relevant philosophical underpinnings. Sadly, this book was a good example of the former and not the latter.
Setiya drops this bit of writing, outlining what the book will cover:
Unfortunately, as mentioned above, I was just not a fan of the presentation style of this one. The author tends to drone on in a somewhat monotonous fashion; which thoroughly bored me to tears. I found my attention wandering numerous times...
Sadly, the lackluster prose proved to be the least of this book's problems...
Alarm bells went off for me early on, as the author mentions climate change 4 times in the introduction alone. A search of the PDF version I have reveals that it appears in the book an incredible 29 times. Now, call me old-fashioned if you will, but I didn't pick up a book on philosophy to read moronic screechings about how the Earth is doomed and the sky is falling. But, just like an evangelical Christian who never shuts up about Jesus, these climate alarmists just can't help themselves.
There was also the inclusion of quite a lot of partisan jargon that liberally peppers the writing here. The author trots out the terms "equity," "disproportionate impact," "marginalized people," and other assorted mindless jargon typically employed by the ideologically possessed too many times to count. SIGH
This was downright ridiculous at times, no more so than when the author casually drops in the line that there is a "revival of fascism" taking place. Say what?? Where is fascism being revived? Who is reviving it? Are they in the room with you now?? Nonsense like this makes me wonder if these people even understand what fascism actually is/was. SPOILER: It's not stuff you don't like, or even the dreaded Evil Orange Man™ ...
I just about laughed out loud when Setiya quotes Karl Marx numerous times, as well as race-grifter Ta-Nehisi Coates. There is also a bit of writing waxing poetic on The Frankfurt School's Neo-Marxist "Critical Theory."
And although he never comes right out and says it here, I would bet that the author is actually a communist. It's becoming very fashionable for those in the academic and media class to align themselves as "fellow travelers." "Useful idiots" might be a better term... That this person can cite Karl Marx, Angela Davis, The Frankfurt School, BLM and other openly Marxist prescriptions while warning the reader about fascism reemerging has got to be at the peak of irony.
The commie propaganda keeps coming as the book proceeds, seemingly accelerating towards the end. He tells the reader how terrible white people are; going off on many NPC-level victimology diatribes. There's an entire chapter about how climate change will doom us all, and how capitalism is an evil system.
He drops this bit of low-resolution writing about how America is a racist country:
~ Conspicuously missing from this comparison is the fact that Asian men somehow manage to outperform native European whites in income earned, in this supposedly rigged "white supremacist" society.
FWIW; white Americans are nowhere near the top of the high-income earners by race:
Given that I had to listen to the short-sighted ramblings and prescriptions of this moron for the duration of the book, I feel like I should offer my own advice to him; in kind. Perhaps he should go and live in one of the socialist paradises that he waxes so nostalgically about here. Or, failing that - maybe he should pick up a few books on recent history and see that, despite being implemented in dozens of countries across many different cultures and times, socialism has never worked anywhere. Ever. Everyone becomes equal, alright. Equally poor and miserable.
And I'm sorry if I went off on my own little rant here, but it strikes me as the absolute pinnacle of irony that privileged people like the author can paradoxically enjoy all the fruits that a market economy provides to their lives, while simultaneously advocating for the most destructive political ideology that the world has ever known. 100 million dead in 100 years is a rough figure that is likely underestimated. Death is a preferable alternative to Communism.
This idiocy needs to be pushed back against wherever it pops up, to ensure people learn from the mistakes of the past. And if killing 100 million of your own people in the pursuit of an impossible utopia is not a mistake, then I don't know what is...
Which comes around to the central point here: Why tf this partisan preaching was even added to a book of this nature in the first place? I have read literally dozens of books in this genre, and don't remember any of the authors of those books going off on ranty emotional tears full of political jargon and rhetoric. That kind of shit has no business in a book like this.
********************
I did not like Life Is Hard. Most of the writing here is not much more than the ramblings of a garden-variety ideologically-possessed evangelical partisan. All the fancy words and pontification presented here; pure sophistry.
That the author is helping shape young impressionable minds at a highly accredited institution of higher learning honestly scares the shit out of me...
Remind me to take a hard pass on anything else he produces.
1 star, and off to the return bin.
~ Ludwig Wittgenstein
I was in the mood to do some reading about mindset, so I bumped this one up in my "to-read" queue. Unfortunately, I did not enjoy the writing here... It started off fairly innocuously, and then turned into an absolute shitshow as the book progressed. More below. This will be a long one, so get comfortable.
The book opens with the quote above.
Author Kieran Setiya is a Professor of Philosophy at the Massachusetts Institute of Technology. He was born in Hull, UK. He is known for his work in ethics, epistemology, and the philosophy of mind.
Kieran Setiya:
The book opens with a decent intro. Unfortunately, this was probably the high water mark of the book. I am admittedly very particular about how engaging I find a book's prose, and this one missed the mark for me here. I was just not a fan of the author's writing style.
I have found that, broadly speaking; books on philosophy break into two disticnt categories. The first is where the author goes off on long-winded esoteric tangents, and manages to effectively lose the forest for the trees. The second is where the author tells the reader an interesting story, and accompanies this story with the relevant philosophical underpinnings. Sadly, this book was a good example of the former and not the latter.
Setiya drops this bit of writing, outlining what the book will cover:
"Philosophy cannot promise happiness or an ideal life, but it can help to lift the weight of human suffering. We’ll begin with the frailties of the body, make our way through love and loss to the structure of society, and end with “the whole residual cosmos.” Spoiler alert: if you want to know the meaning of life, the answer’s in Chapter 6."
Unfortunately, as mentioned above, I was just not a fan of the presentation style of this one. The author tends to drone on in a somewhat monotonous fashion; which thoroughly bored me to tears. I found my attention wandering numerous times...
Sadly, the lackluster prose proved to be the least of this book's problems...
Alarm bells went off for me early on, as the author mentions climate change 4 times in the introduction alone. A search of the PDF version I have reveals that it appears in the book an incredible 29 times. Now, call me old-fashioned if you will, but I didn't pick up a book on philosophy to read moronic screechings about how the Earth is doomed and the sky is falling. But, just like an evangelical Christian who never shuts up about Jesus, these climate alarmists just can't help themselves.
There was also the inclusion of quite a lot of partisan jargon that liberally peppers the writing here. The author trots out the terms "equity," "disproportionate impact," "marginalized people," and other assorted mindless jargon typically employed by the ideologically possessed too many times to count. SIGH
This was downright ridiculous at times, no more so than when the author casually drops in the line that there is a "revival of fascism" taking place. Say what?? Where is fascism being revived? Who is reviving it? Are they in the room with you now?? Nonsense like this makes me wonder if these people even understand what fascism actually is/was. SPOILER: It's not stuff you don't like, or even the dreaded Evil Orange Man™ ...
I just about laughed out loud when Setiya quotes Karl Marx numerous times, as well as race-grifter Ta-Nehisi Coates. There is also a bit of writing waxing poetic on The Frankfurt School's Neo-Marxist "Critical Theory."
And although he never comes right out and says it here, I would bet that the author is actually a communist. It's becoming very fashionable for those in the academic and media class to align themselves as "fellow travelers." "Useful idiots" might be a better term... That this person can cite Karl Marx, Angela Davis, The Frankfurt School, BLM and other openly Marxist prescriptions while warning the reader about fascism reemerging has got to be at the peak of irony.
The commie propaganda keeps coming as the book proceeds, seemingly accelerating towards the end. He tells the reader how terrible white people are; going off on many NPC-level victimology diatribes. There's an entire chapter about how climate change will doom us all, and how capitalism is an evil system.
He drops this bit of low-resolution writing about how America is a racist country:
"...Americans benefit from a history of colonial expropriation and slavery that in part explains the huge disparity in median wealth between White families (a median of roughly $188,000) and Black ones (around $24,000)."
~ Conspicuously missing from this comparison is the fact that Asian men somehow manage to outperform native European whites in income earned, in this supposedly rigged "white supremacist" society.
FWIW; white Americans are nowhere near the top of the high-income earners by race:
Given that I had to listen to the short-sighted ramblings and prescriptions of this moron for the duration of the book, I feel like I should offer my own advice to him; in kind. Perhaps he should go and live in one of the socialist paradises that he waxes so nostalgically about here. Or, failing that - maybe he should pick up a few books on recent history and see that, despite being implemented in dozens of countries across many different cultures and times, socialism has never worked anywhere. Ever. Everyone becomes equal, alright. Equally poor and miserable.
And I'm sorry if I went off on my own little rant here, but it strikes me as the absolute pinnacle of irony that privileged people like the author can paradoxically enjoy all the fruits that a market economy provides to their lives, while simultaneously advocating for the most destructive political ideology that the world has ever known. 100 million dead in 100 years is a rough figure that is likely underestimated. Death is a preferable alternative to Communism.
This idiocy needs to be pushed back against wherever it pops up, to ensure people learn from the mistakes of the past. And if killing 100 million of your own people in the pursuit of an impossible utopia is not a mistake, then I don't know what is...
Which comes around to the central point here: Why tf this partisan preaching was even added to a book of this nature in the first place? I have read literally dozens of books in this genre, and don't remember any of the authors of those books going off on ranty emotional tears full of political jargon and rhetoric. That kind of shit has no business in a book like this.
********************
I did not like Life Is Hard. Most of the writing here is not much more than the ramblings of a garden-variety ideologically-possessed evangelical partisan. All the fancy words and pontification presented here; pure sophistry.
That the author is helping shape young impressionable minds at a highly accredited institution of higher learning honestly scares the shit out of me...
Remind me to take a hard pass on anything else he produces.
1 star, and off to the return bin.
January 11, 2023
I liked the way the author presented subjects, looking at key challenges we face as individuals (pain, grief etc) and the work to try assess some of the philosophical foundations that have been used to guide people through, as well as personal experiences. However, I found that the author struggled to find a balance between talking about the philosophy underpinning what he was saying, his own experiences and trying to sum things up in a way to appeal to a reader. This made it difficult for me to latch on to the content in a way that felt particularly impactful.
I think this became most pronounced towards the end of the book where the author discusses some of the debate around the value of “hope”. The initial presentation was intriguing (is hope a useful concept) but I struggled to engage as the author moved towards contemporary discussions about climate change - namely because I didn’t get a good understanding of how he was connecting this to the wider philosophy he was talking about or providing additional depth and detail to explain how the philosophy could be used to influence real world action beyond a high level issue identification.
All in all, the book identifies a number of real challenges that are ripe for wider discussion about how we can prepare ourselves to face them, but it doesn't always hit the mark of giving me the discussion expected. There’s certainly value here, just difficult for me to define in a way that unlocked it for me.
I think this became most pronounced towards the end of the book where the author discusses some of the debate around the value of “hope”. The initial presentation was intriguing (is hope a useful concept) but I struggled to engage as the author moved towards contemporary discussions about climate change - namely because I didn’t get a good understanding of how he was connecting this to the wider philosophy he was talking about or providing additional depth and detail to explain how the philosophy could be used to influence real world action beyond a high level issue identification.
All in all, the book identifies a number of real challenges that are ripe for wider discussion about how we can prepare ourselves to face them, but it doesn't always hit the mark of giving me the discussion expected. There’s certainly value here, just difficult for me to define in a way that unlocked it for me.
November 9, 2022
Setiya is worth reading if you happen to be a human being. His newest book Life is Hard reflects on some of the different ways life can be… well.. hard. Setiya reflects on illness and disability, loneliness, grief, injustice, absurdity, and, strikingly, hope. And as he’s reflecting on these rough patches in human existence, he points out ways that philosophy could help us a bit when life is hard in that particular way. His earlier book Midlife was in roughly the same vein, but focused on the midlife crisis and its near neighbors. Both books are very well-written and sensible.
These two books are part of a broader shift happening within contemporary analytic philosophy. Analytic philosophers have been writing more books like this in the past ten years than they did in the decades before.
I love analytic philosophy—even the wildly esoteric and technical parts. But there have been a few really powerful pieces of writing about the human condition in an analytic style for a long time now. The essays in Thomas Nagel’s Mortal Questions are the classic reference points. And it always seemed like we could maybe do more of that. People often criticized the analytic approach for avoiding exactly the topics that people care about most. And I understand that, at some point, analytic philsophy’s self-conception(s) barred it from really having anything helpful to say about the things that matter most in life. But those limiting self-conceptions are largely relics at this point. The field is not all language games now and hasn’t been for over fifty years.
So, from my perspective, this new movement is a good thing. Maybe even a great one. This is a movement without a manifesto—but the books I’m thinking of have some things in common. First, the authors are reflecting on problems and questions grounded in everyday life or the human condition. And the questions are not only ethical. They might talk about some ethical theories and dilemmas. But they also ask things like —‘what makes life worth living’, ‘what’s the best we can hope for’, ‘does anything matter if I, we, the universe are all annihilated in the end.’ And so on. Second, they talk about these things in something like the analytic spirit. They largely use plain language, clearly state their claims and arguments, make helpful distinctions, explain the terms that they introduce as best they can, and generally strive to be as lucid as possible. Third, they also try to write in a style that is accessible to the general public and not just other analytic philosophers. And so the books often have many illustrative examples, sometimes autobiographical and sometimes from history and literature or film. This is probably the main thing that separates these books from academic articles or monographs that deal with the same topics.
So is there a name for this genre and the movement it belongs to? Not that I’m aware of. The area of study belongs to value theory, but there is no concise name for this particular part of it. I’m going to call it ‘analytic existentialism’ for now. Analytic because the language used is clear and the authors usually have a background in that tradition; existentialism because the questions and topics are roughly the sort of things that we associate with the figures whose names are often thrown under that vague banner. The other option I see is ‘analytic self-help’. And that’s okay, but would only cover part of the genre I’m trying to pick out. Some of these books are more about offering an opportunity to reflect on the human condition than offering us any help.
But Setiya explicitly sets out to show us how philosophy can help us: ‘There is no cure for the human condition. But after twenty years teaching and studying moral philosophy, I believe that it can help. This book explains how.’ And maybe it can. Setiya and I have our differences on a few of the topics he covers. But I enjoyed hearing him out even when I disagreed most. Thinking hard about life is one of the few tools we have to help make our way through it. I hope there’s more to come.
(If this sort of book interests you, I highly recommend a few others—
Iddo Landau’s Finding Meaning in an Imperfect World
Susan Wolf’s Meaning in Life
Thomas Hurka’s The Best Things in Life)
These two books are part of a broader shift happening within contemporary analytic philosophy. Analytic philosophers have been writing more books like this in the past ten years than they did in the decades before.
I love analytic philosophy—even the wildly esoteric and technical parts. But there have been a few really powerful pieces of writing about the human condition in an analytic style for a long time now. The essays in Thomas Nagel’s Mortal Questions are the classic reference points. And it always seemed like we could maybe do more of that. People often criticized the analytic approach for avoiding exactly the topics that people care about most. And I understand that, at some point, analytic philsophy’s self-conception(s) barred it from really having anything helpful to say about the things that matter most in life. But those limiting self-conceptions are largely relics at this point. The field is not all language games now and hasn’t been for over fifty years.
So, from my perspective, this new movement is a good thing. Maybe even a great one. This is a movement without a manifesto—but the books I’m thinking of have some things in common. First, the authors are reflecting on problems and questions grounded in everyday life or the human condition. And the questions are not only ethical. They might talk about some ethical theories and dilemmas. But they also ask things like —‘what makes life worth living’, ‘what’s the best we can hope for’, ‘does anything matter if I, we, the universe are all annihilated in the end.’ And so on. Second, they talk about these things in something like the analytic spirit. They largely use plain language, clearly state their claims and arguments, make helpful distinctions, explain the terms that they introduce as best they can, and generally strive to be as lucid as possible. Third, they also try to write in a style that is accessible to the general public and not just other analytic philosophers. And so the books often have many illustrative examples, sometimes autobiographical and sometimes from history and literature or film. This is probably the main thing that separates these books from academic articles or monographs that deal with the same topics.
So is there a name for this genre and the movement it belongs to? Not that I’m aware of. The area of study belongs to value theory, but there is no concise name for this particular part of it. I’m going to call it ‘analytic existentialism’ for now. Analytic because the language used is clear and the authors usually have a background in that tradition; existentialism because the questions and topics are roughly the sort of things that we associate with the figures whose names are often thrown under that vague banner. The other option I see is ‘analytic self-help’. And that’s okay, but would only cover part of the genre I’m trying to pick out. Some of these books are more about offering an opportunity to reflect on the human condition than offering us any help.
But Setiya explicitly sets out to show us how philosophy can help us: ‘There is no cure for the human condition. But after twenty years teaching and studying moral philosophy, I believe that it can help. This book explains how.’ And maybe it can. Setiya and I have our differences on a few of the topics he covers. But I enjoyed hearing him out even when I disagreed most. Thinking hard about life is one of the few tools we have to help make our way through it. I hope there’s more to come.
(If this sort of book interests you, I highly recommend a few others—
Iddo Landau’s Finding Meaning in an Imperfect World
Susan Wolf’s Meaning in Life
Thomas Hurka’s The Best Things in Life)
June 12, 2023
It seems to me impossible to write about the human condition without a solid foundation in science, mathematics, and technology. Mr. Setiya, a professor of philosophy at MIT, has a warm and approachable persona and some new ideas in support of the unsurprising thesis that life is hard, but falls back, for the most part, on recounting the great philosophers of history and the thought experiments that they applied, ignorant of science as they were. Alain de Botton, in contrast, has brought philosophy up to date and used it, in The School of Life, to help us to live and feel better.
Why does MIT, one of the world's greatest institutions of science, mathematics, and engineering, even teach philosophy?
The Welcome to the MIT Philosophy Undergraduate Program on the MIT website posits that:
Why does MIT, one of the world's greatest institutions of science, mathematics, and engineering, even teach philosophy?
The Welcome to the MIT Philosophy Undergraduate Program on the MIT website posits that:
Over the last 2,500 years, philosophy has transformed physics, biology, logic and mathematics, economics, politics, linguistics, psychology, religion, culture, and our understanding of how we should live.The transformation worked mostly in the opposite direction.
August 6, 2024
O carte buna, mai ales pentru pasionații de filosofie. Nu este, însă, atât de accesibila, mi-a fost greu sa înțeleg unele idei și nu numai din cauza dificultății lor, dar și pentru că am avut impresia că autorul se pierde în explicații și că adaugă prea multe viziuni ale altor autori, creând un amalgam de idei care ducea la pierderea unei coerente.
Cel mai mult mi-a plăcut capitolul despre eșec, de unde am aflat că noi ne cream in mintea noastră un soi de narațiune liniara, că ne explicam viața în această manieră: incepe, se fixează contextul, apare un punct culminant, apoi evenimentul vedeta și deznodamantul și asta este toată viața noastră, pe când viața noastră este mai mult decât o compunere de clasa a 5-a, iar eșecul și succesul nu ar trebui sa se rezume la proiecte. Suntem o sumă a acestora doua.
Cel mai mult mi-a plăcut capitolul despre eșec, de unde am aflat că noi ne cream in mintea noastră un soi de narațiune liniara, că ne explicam viața în această manieră: incepe, se fixează contextul, apare un punct culminant, apoi evenimentul vedeta și deznodamantul și asta este toată viața noastră, pe când viața noastră este mai mult decât o compunere de clasa a 5-a, iar eșecul și succesul nu ar trebui sa se rezume la proiecte. Suntem o sumă a acestora doua.
Shelved as 'tr-again'
January 3, 2023First, this book is much better than its title or chapter headings. The book may not be for everyone, but for those like me who think they have more yesterdays than tomorrows, this has much to offer. In the past couple of years, I have noticed that many of the tools or crutches that I have used to motivate myself or navigate life just do not work anymore as well, not that life is deteriorating or bad, but just that some of the underlying assumptions or guideposts about the future are not the same. While I might sound like I am introducing a self-help book and in some ways, it may be so, it is quite different from the most on offer.
The book is broken down into topics such as failure, grief, absurdity, hope, and a couple more. In each, the author offers a couple of perspectives drawing from literature, philosophy, and other fields. His sources tend to be narrow and he focuses on only a few aspects, but they are powerful and not so obvious, at least for me. For example, in the topic on failure, he questions if there is any reason life has to be a story for it to be meaningful and speaks of telic activities (the ones that work towards an endpoint) and atelic activities (ones that do not). He tends to make a case of why individual life requires us to connect with others and address injustice, even without using arguments driven by morality. I was not fully convinced of some of them, but this book is a rich read nonetheless, one that I might return to.
The book is broken down into topics such as failure, grief, absurdity, hope, and a couple more. In each, the author offers a couple of perspectives drawing from literature, philosophy, and other fields. His sources tend to be narrow and he focuses on only a few aspects, but they are powerful and not so obvious, at least for me. For example, in the topic on failure, he questions if there is any reason life has to be a story for it to be meaningful and speaks of telic activities (the ones that work towards an endpoint) and atelic activities (ones that do not). He tends to make a case of why individual life requires us to connect with others and address injustice, even without using arguments driven by morality. I was not fully convinced of some of them, but this book is a rich read nonetheless, one that I might return to.
January 24, 2023
There's some wisdom in "Life Is Hard," maybe some balm for souls rubbed raw by the travails and tragedies of life, Setiya's take on the meaning of life, even a proverbial (if light) kick in the butt to get out there and do something. Anything.
There are also a lot of words for the sake of words, and philosophizing for the sake of philosophizing. The author ventures into thoughts, but all thoughts are not created equal. A lot of these particular ones could have been summarized by the profound "shit happens, shit is, go along to get along, except when it's just too much, then do something about it. Repeat, and then you die"
Admittedly, the author got through to me on a number of occasions, and I'm a pretty tough sell on purely philosophical works. Besides, it was an interesting read - even if, at my own end, I doubt that Setiya's philosophizing will have contributed much to me finding my way.
But who knows, maybe this is just the tea to soothe your insides, scald your tongue, or, perchance both?
There are also a lot of words for the sake of words, and philosophizing for the sake of philosophizing. The author ventures into thoughts, but all thoughts are not created equal. A lot of these particular ones could have been summarized by the profound "shit happens, shit is, go along to get along, except when it's just too much, then do something about it. Repeat, and then you die"
Admittedly, the author got through to me on a number of occasions, and I'm a pretty tough sell on purely philosophical works. Besides, it was an interesting read - even if, at my own end, I doubt that Setiya's philosophizing will have contributed much to me finding my way.
But who knows, maybe this is just the tea to soothe your insides, scald your tongue, or, perchance both?
November 6, 2022
An interesting journey through the trials and tribulations of life with a thoughtful philosopher as your guide. Though I didn't always agree with the guide's perspectives, they were always interesting. This was especially so of the last chapter, on hope. Worth reading.
January 9, 2025
I am ... not a fan of self-help books, and anything subtitled "How Philosophy Can Help Us Find Our Way" is, when you come down to it, a self-help book.
But. Kieran Setiya has cred for talking about how to cope with Life Being Hard, in that he has lived with chronic pain since he was twenty-seven. Also, he takes seriously the political and environmental -- "problems" is too weak a word, so let's say the catastrophic external conditions that can't be positive-thinking-ed away. Setiya is impatient with theodicies and reassurances ("You'll be fine," etc.); he's not a Stoic, either -- he insists on the value of attachment.
I read this a year or more ago (dates noted here more or less at random), and looking at my flags and marginal notes reminds me that I found a lot to argue with. But one reason I rarely pick up a self-help book is that there's almost never anything in them worth arguing with. This one, I think I'll read again.
But. Kieran Setiya has cred for talking about how to cope with Life Being Hard, in that he has lived with chronic pain since he was twenty-seven. Also, he takes seriously the political and environmental -- "problems" is too weak a word, so let's say the catastrophic external conditions that can't be positive-thinking-ed away. Setiya is impatient with theodicies and reassurances ("You'll be fine," etc.); he's not a Stoic, either -- he insists on the value of attachment.
I read this a year or more ago (dates noted here more or less at random), and looking at my flags and marginal notes reminds me that I found a lot to argue with. But one reason I rarely pick up a self-help book is that there's almost never anything in them worth arguing with. This one, I think I'll read again.
If there are models of what it would be like to take injustice and human suffering seriously, to make no excuse for oneself, there is none better than Simone Weil. The problem is that her model is terrifying. Inspiring, yes, but terrifying, too. I couldn't do with my life what Weil did with hers; who among us could? If that is what it means to care about injustice, maybe I don't care, after all. Maybe I shouldn't.On the shelf next to Martha Nussbaum, Elaine Scarry, Todd May, and some historians of WWI.
It is doubts like this that bring us to philosophy, searching for an argument to prove that we should care. ...
March 10, 2025
This is a book that I could have really used in my twenties. At the same time, I don't think it would have had the same impact as reading it at this point in my life did. After all, what did I truly know of grief, or injustice, or of how life often seems futile at that age? Reading about it is not the same as living it. The map is not the territory.
This is not a self-help book. There are no checklists, or bullet points, or whatever number of easy steps to follow. This is a book of moral philosophy. Traditionally, moral philosophy covered everything that matters in life. It was assumed that reflection on how to live should in turn improve our lives. However, this often morphed into "a more quixotic goal: the best or ideal life." (pg. 3) Plato gives us an impossible utopia run by philosopher kings, not any practical advice on how to improve our societies. Aristotle recommends living the best of all possible lives, but sets unreachable standards of "lacking in nothing," and only one path for everyone to get there. The ancient Stoics believed that we can weather any hardship or setback if we learn to control our emotions, but how many of us could remain unbothered by the death of someone we love? Should we even want to? Kieran Setiya believes that this pursuit of the best, perfect life will only lead to disappointment. Instead, we should be honest with ourselves: life is hard. As a professor of philosophy, for him it naturally followed to explore how we can use philosophy to cope.
• Disease and/or disability (the biological) may not affect the quality of life so much as poor accommodation to participate in society. Infirmity often comes from a mismatch between bodies and the built environment.
• Aristotle believed in perfectionism in friendship, too, but friendship should not be a meritocracy. The friendship matters because the friend does, and the friend matters because all people have value. Once the transaction of friendship outweighs the value of the friend, we are on our way to isolation and loneliness.
• Grief doesn't come in stages, or with a narrative, but ebbs and flows in waves. Mourning rituals can give structure to help us through the most acute part.
• If we treat all our activities as if they are means to a final goal, then we are forever living for the future of fulfilment, or for the past of when we met our goal and checked it off. This is also when failure feels most personal, if goals aren't met. Focusing on the process instead of the goals puts us back in the present and softens setbacks.
Of all the philosophy Setiya presents, what connected the most with me goes down a rather existentialist path; that we each have value, we each deserve dignity, we each have potential but circumstances might thwart it, and that while there's no ready set of easy answers, we should strive for balance and connection. Those who are looking for a ready set of easy answers will be disappointed. But those who are willing to engage with the questions and the wide variety of philosophy presented will probably find something to think about that resonates with all of our lives.
This is not a self-help book. There are no checklists, or bullet points, or whatever number of easy steps to follow. This is a book of moral philosophy. Traditionally, moral philosophy covered everything that matters in life. It was assumed that reflection on how to live should in turn improve our lives. However, this often morphed into "a more quixotic goal: the best or ideal life." (pg. 3) Plato gives us an impossible utopia run by philosopher kings, not any practical advice on how to improve our societies. Aristotle recommends living the best of all possible lives, but sets unreachable standards of "lacking in nothing," and only one path for everyone to get there. The ancient Stoics believed that we can weather any hardship or setback if we learn to control our emotions, but how many of us could remain unbothered by the death of someone we love? Should we even want to? Kieran Setiya believes that this pursuit of the best, perfect life will only lead to disappointment. Instead, we should be honest with ourselves: life is hard. As a professor of philosophy, for him it naturally followed to explore how we can use philosophy to cope.
No one's experience is broad or deep enough to stand for everyone's. Our perspective is always limited, with its unique distortions and blind spots. But there could be a philosophy that speaks from one's own life, even as it draws on arguments and thought experiments, philosophical theories and distinctions. It would blur the lines between the argumentative and the personal essay, between the discipline of philosophy and the lived experience of someone who finds philosophy ready-to-hand, a tool with which to work through life's adversities. It would draw us back to the original meaning of "philosophy"—the love of wisdom—and to philosophy as a way of life. (pg. xii)Instead of using a school of philosophy to show you how you should pursue the best of all possible lives, or a perpetual state of happiness, Setiya devotes a chapter apiece to difficulties we all have and will wrestle with at some point: infirmity, loneliness, grief, failure, injustice, absurdity, and the double-edged qualities of hope. In each, he looks at what various philosophers have said on these subjects, and puts their writings to the test of real life, often using the experiences he knows best, his own. Through this journey, Setiya explores how we might deal with the difficulties inherent in life. Some of the points I found interesting include;
• Disease and/or disability (the biological) may not affect the quality of life so much as poor accommodation to participate in society. Infirmity often comes from a mismatch between bodies and the built environment.
• Aristotle believed in perfectionism in friendship, too, but friendship should not be a meritocracy. The friendship matters because the friend does, and the friend matters because all people have value. Once the transaction of friendship outweighs the value of the friend, we are on our way to isolation and loneliness.
• Grief doesn't come in stages, or with a narrative, but ebbs and flows in waves. Mourning rituals can give structure to help us through the most acute part.
• If we treat all our activities as if they are means to a final goal, then we are forever living for the future of fulfilment, or for the past of when we met our goal and checked it off. This is also when failure feels most personal, if goals aren't met. Focusing on the process instead of the goals puts us back in the present and softens setbacks.
Of all the philosophy Setiya presents, what connected the most with me goes down a rather existentialist path; that we each have value, we each deserve dignity, we each have potential but circumstances might thwart it, and that while there's no ready set of easy answers, we should strive for balance and connection. Those who are looking for a ready set of easy answers will be disappointed. But those who are willing to engage with the questions and the wide variety of philosophy presented will probably find something to think about that resonates with all of our lives.
January 9, 2024
En helt ok bok som iaf rör sig bort från den trötta självhjälpstrenden. Men tycker den var rörigt skriven och likt Martin Hägglunds bok (som dock håller högre kvalitet) känns det som om syftet med boken (att visa hur filosofi kan hjälpa i ett tufft liv) snarare är ett svepskäl för politisk kommentering. På så sätt vet man inte riktigt hur man ska placera boken.
November 15, 2022
To quote the title, life is hard, and Kieran Setiya tackles the subject of living philosophically with ferocious interrogations into the meaning of existence. He recommends a guide to human satisfaction: enjoy living well, as opposed to chasing ideal happiness or attaining perfection. Exploring universal questions through famous works of literature and personal imprints of being, Setiya examines how we can endure adversity by setting new expectations for our inner ambitions.
In analyzing the philosophical topics expounded upon in this book, I was dissatisfied with the results. Setiya seems to be advocating for settling, going quietly about our lives without dreaming, without wanting something better than a life considered to be good enough. He asks that we be satisfied with decency, as opposed to striving for happiness or perfection. While attempting to work through these conundrums, he cites the work of philosophers and writers such as Aristotle, Virginia Woolf, and Fyodor Dostoevsky. He argues with all of them, and does not budge on his own opinions of their work, stating them as fact. He consistently uses generalization, and offers a bleak vision of the world that is crowded with adversity and absurdity. The most difficult part of the book is the language, which often contradicts itself, and is not accessibly written for the average reader. Setiya is at his most eloquent when meditating upon grief, but fails to truly capture the heart of human consciousness as a whole. Instead of accepting our lot as he suggests, we must allow ourselves to dream of a better future.
In analyzing the philosophical topics expounded upon in this book, I was dissatisfied with the results. Setiya seems to be advocating for settling, going quietly about our lives without dreaming, without wanting something better than a life considered to be good enough. He asks that we be satisfied with decency, as opposed to striving for happiness or perfection. While attempting to work through these conundrums, he cites the work of philosophers and writers such as Aristotle, Virginia Woolf, and Fyodor Dostoevsky. He argues with all of them, and does not budge on his own opinions of their work, stating them as fact. He consistently uses generalization, and offers a bleak vision of the world that is crowded with adversity and absurdity. The most difficult part of the book is the language, which often contradicts itself, and is not accessibly written for the average reader. Setiya is at his most eloquent when meditating upon grief, but fails to truly capture the heart of human consciousness as a whole. Instead of accepting our lot as he suggests, we must allow ourselves to dream of a better future.
March 9, 2023
About 3 to 3.5 stars.
I think this is worth reading, because it's honest and consoling in many parts, and raises interesting philosophical questions. But a lot of the time when I wanted him to delve deeper, he stopped just short of it. My main takeaway is the same as this LARB review:
I think this is worth reading, because it's honest and consoling in many parts, and raises interesting philosophical questions. But a lot of the time when I wanted him to delve deeper, he stopped just short of it. My main takeaway is the same as this LARB review:
I didn’t find that Life is Hard helped quite as much as I’d hoped, though, with my own existential angst. The issue, for me, is mainly one of style. Setiya claims in his introduction that he wants to “draw on everything [he’s got],” in a way that makes philosophy “continuous with literature, history, memoir, film.” He does use examples from each of these genres and art forms throughout, but the writing itself is squarely in the mode of mainstream public philosophy. The tone is companionable and sincere, the prose simple and direct. Setiya is clearly concerned with not overtaxing or boring his readers, meaning that he moves relatively quickly through his material and doesn’t dwell on objections to his points. Autobiographical narrative or cultural anecdote often introduces a subject, but cedes swiftly to theory. Setiya is such a brilliant philosopher, skillful writer, and sensitive person that in several places I feel he is holding back his full self, in service to what he imagines a popular audience wants.
October 16, 2022
Antidote to toxic positivity, yet not an all-out depressing take on life. The author shared about his personal pain (physical and otherwise), and brings an “authentic” steady and real perspective about how life can be hard, but also fascinating, purposeful, and many other things.
April 23, 2024
The chapters in the book, “loneliness, grief, justice, etc” all share one major theme. Progress in life’s challenges are accomplished by action. We can all experience loss, fear, and unjust actions, but the only way to overcome them is by taking the appropriate steps against them.
I disagree with the authors interpretation of stoicism, especially since the Stoics teach that we should only pay attention to what we can control. Something the author seems to agree with. Stoicism is not about inaction, it’s about taking ownership over what life throws at you.
I agree, life is hard. Life used to be a lot harder though. We have advanced as a civilization to solve many points of friction unimaginable to our ancestors. The future is not as bleak as the author prescribes. We have a long way to go, but action will get us there. As mentioned in the book, hope is not blind faith, it is a way to move forward.
I disagree with the authors interpretation of stoicism, especially since the Stoics teach that we should only pay attention to what we can control. Something the author seems to agree with. Stoicism is not about inaction, it’s about taking ownership over what life throws at you.
I agree, life is hard. Life used to be a lot harder though. We have advanced as a civilization to solve many points of friction unimaginable to our ancestors. The future is not as bleak as the author prescribes. We have a long way to go, but action will get us there. As mentioned in the book, hope is not blind faith, it is a way to move forward.
Read
September 6, 2024Hoping to audit Setiya’s Moral Philosophy and the Good Life class at MIT this sem, which serendipitously happens during my break between immunology and pathology
Thought lots about Nick’s philosophy of love work, as he cites Setiya regularly, and about Martin (obviously, always) as Setiya credits Boyle and Moran for proofreading his work
Thought lots about Nick’s philosophy of love work, as he cites Setiya regularly, and about Martin (obviously, always) as Setiya credits Boyle and Moran for proofreading his work
February 23, 2025
A philosophycal approach to different stages of life that we all went, are or will go through inevitably at some point. I loved the grounded way of explaining the thinking we should consider adapting in our life towards these stages, for example grief or sickness. It is in a way re-assuring that life goes on.
The book has a very rich list of recommendations for other books or authors that have expressed similar approach, which I find rewarding if one wants to deepen their knowledge in this topic
The book has a very rich list of recommendations for other books or authors that have expressed similar approach, which I find rewarding if one wants to deepen their knowledge in this topic
December 31, 2022
I had higher hopes for this book than the book delivered. It was an interesting read but it frankly wasn't deep enough.
I did enjoy the discussion of telic versus atelic thinking and have definitely applied some of that into my thinking.
I did enjoy the discussion of telic versus atelic thinking and have definitely applied some of that into my thinking.
March 8, 2025
While there were a couple decent takeaways, I found this read simply too tedious.
December 31, 2024
It’s fine. There’s some interesting ideas. I’m sure as a course or lecture this would’ve been better. And maybe it’s the fact that I’ve discovered that caffeine pills are a thing, and I don’t think my heart rate has dropped below 120 for the last few weeks, but I find myself incredibly impatient with this book spending way too much time talking about things that didn’t seem to drive it forward.
Reading philosophy is such a treat when you can understand it. But reading people discuss reading philosophy is it’s own special circle of hell. Some thing to bear in mind, I guess.
In an ideal world, I get all of my modern philosophy from strange hermits residing in the woods, whatever odd man cave/faraday cage Jaron Lanier lives in, or from beautiful women who reside in ponds distributing political science philosophy, as well as swords
Reading philosophy is such a treat when you can understand it. But reading people discuss reading philosophy is it’s own special circle of hell. Some thing to bear in mind, I guess.
In an ideal world, I get all of my modern philosophy from strange hermits residing in the woods, whatever odd man cave/faraday cage Jaron Lanier lives in, or from beautiful women who reside in ponds distributing political science philosophy, as well as swords
November 23, 2022
Philosophy lite (very light, disappointingly). I'm not sure whether we ever get to what the subtitle intimates (more attentive readers: do we?), but then I got a little lost in the author's strangely didactic section on Adorno. Setiya seems disappointed with Adorno's skepticism of academics channeling their energies into activism rather than scholarship. I was intrigued -- and was hoping for a more charitable (and in-depth) treatment of Adorno's position, not a scolding. Unfortunately, I will have to look for that somewhere else.
November 3, 2022
I enjoyed this book. Basically the thought is that life is not always going to be perfect and well but it’s easier to navigate if we accept that fact.
I really enjoyed the author’s negative viewpoint on viewing your own life and other peoples’ lives as a linear narrative culminating at some point in the future. Instead of valuing the end result, value the journey through life. Maybe that is why I enjoy exercising so much. Sure, I kind of have goals, but the main joy for me is the everyday day, the journey.
This book makes no attempt to sugar coat life. Once we accept the fact that we and others will always have troubles life will become more bearable and enjoyable.
I really enjoyed the author’s negative viewpoint on viewing your own life and other peoples’ lives as a linear narrative culminating at some point in the future. Instead of valuing the end result, value the journey through life. Maybe that is why I enjoy exercising so much. Sure, I kind of have goals, but the main joy for me is the everyday day, the journey.
This book makes no attempt to sugar coat life. Once we accept the fact that we and others will always have troubles life will become more bearable and enjoyable.
January 19, 2023
I liked this book. Life is hard and Setiya, who personally suffers from chronic, debilitating pain knows this all too well. He mines the work of philosophers, novelists, and other thinkers to look for answers to existential questions like “How do I lead a meaningful life” and “What is the meaning of life?”. I found the chapter on Failure most instructive. Using the term “failure” for a person only began in the 1800’s with the pressures of upward mobility. Ultimately, we need to find good, meaningful work, cultivate relationships, and enjoy nature, art, and music to lead a good life. No real surprises here, but a reminder to be gentle with ourselves and others.
October 24, 2022
I absolutely loved this book. I was unfamiliar with Kieran Setiya’s work, but I instantly become a fan. Kieran is a philosopher, and this book discusses a wide range of challenges we all face in our lives. It discusses relationships, our emotions, death, climate change and so much more. But, what’s great about this book is how many questions Kieran has us readers ask ourselves as we read, which is what great philosophy books are all about. I highly recommend this book and can’t wait to check out more of Kieran’s work.
July 2, 2023
Life Is Hard takes on the topics of pain, loneliness, grief, failure, absurdity, and hope. I think the book can be summed up nicely with the quote:
Even though suffering is inevitable, it doesn’t have to keep you from living well.
At times, engaging with these topics was hard for me. I think I shy away from even wanting to feel these deep emotions. I'm writing this right after finishing the book and I don't feel that strong happy-ending that I'd expected. More of a sobering realism. That's probably what Setiya intended, anyway.
Even though suffering is inevitable, it doesn’t have to keep you from living well.
At times, engaging with these topics was hard for me. I think I shy away from even wanting to feel these deep emotions. I'm writing this right after finishing the book and I don't feel that strong happy-ending that I'd expected. More of a sobering realism. That's probably what Setiya intended, anyway.
August 14, 2023
I read this book about a year ago when it first came out and loved it. For the last couple of weeks, we’ve been taking care of our older cat, and things aren’t looking too good. Books are often where I turn to better understand things, and I remembered this amazing book. Philosophy makes us think and look at situations in ways we may have never considered. This book covers a variety of topics on the hard things we all face as part of the human condition, and I highly recommend it.
August 12, 2023
This will be one to return to time and time again. Sometimes it was a little bogged in the philosophical theory but with a professor of Philosophy for the author, it isn’t surprising. I truly feel that the author has a good mindset for the ups and downs of life and I gained some important perspectives. Great for additional reading material recs, and journaling.
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